"The Hijra date of your birth is Wednsday, 25 Dhi'l-Hijjih 1397 (1397-12-25)."
"if you were born after sundown then the date is 29 Kislev 5738."
"12 baktun 18 katun 4 tun 8 uinal 0 kin"
"Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 4.26379647749511 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)"
"There are 63 days till your next birthday
on which your cake will have 30 candles.
Those 30 candles produce 30 BTUs,
or 7,560 calories of heat (that's only 7.5600 food Calories!) .
You can boil 3.43 US ounces of water with that many candles."
"Hornbeam, the good taste
"Of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, tends to egoism, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads reasonable, disciplined life, looks for kindness, an emotional partner and acknowledgment, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with her feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious."
WHAT THE FUUUUCK THIS IS MADNESS!!!
Thats Exactly Why I Hate Birthdays...Age Shouldve Never Existed...Fuck Humans, Fuck Planets...Fuck Dogs...Fuck Chasing Cats...Fuck Candles...Fuck 7,560 Calories...Fuck Dhi'l-Hijjih...Fuck baktun, katun, tun, uinal And kin...You Heard Me Kin Fuck You...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!